Calm Down: Five practices for reducing stress and anxiety from a Christian Counselor
We live in a stressful and challenging world. We have access to more information than we have ever had and are more globally connected than we have ever been because of the internet and social media. However, somehow in our culture, we have become perpetually disconnected. These two dueling realities as well as global crises have led to an epidemic of anxiety and stress. Chronic and persistent stress has a tremendous impact on our physical and mental health. According to the American Psychological Association, three quarters of adults in America report experiencing health related consequences of high stress, such as headaches (38%) fatigue (35%) feeling nervous or anxious (34%) or feeling depressed (33%). As Christians, we are not immune to experiencing the affects of chronic stress or anxiety.
As people of faith, what can we do to cope with the stressors of life while honoring our faith in a loving God who wants to draw near to us in our struggle? This is not an exhaustive list, but here are a few coping strategies to help manage and decrease stress. I intentionally have called them practices–because none of these things can be done once and for all. Just like we must practice and exercise our faith in order to experience spiritual growth, we must practice these things in order to see the fruit of stress reduction.
1- Practice grounding yourself in the present moment. So often our anxiety is related to worrisome thoughts about the future or regretful thoughts about the past. But the actual moment you are living in might not be such a bad one if you could limit yourself to being all there. Jesus famously said “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” Matthew 6:34 (ESV) A simple exercise for orienting yourself to the present moment involves reviewing your five senses and their experience of your environment–ask yourself to name a few things that each of your senses notice: What do I smell? What do I hear? What do I see? What can I feel? What can I taste?
2- Practice thought distancing. I teach my clients to practice changing the way they talk to themselves about their experiences and emotions. Instead of saying, “I am so anxious!” practice saying, “I notice that I am experiencing anxiety right now.” Or instead of saying “I am just so angry!” practice saying, “I notice I am experiencing some anger right now.” This helps to limit the impact of the thought and distances you from it, which leaves space for you to process the reason for your anxiety or anger without totally giving yourself over to the intensity of these experiences.
3- Practice gratitude. This doesn’t come naturally to many of us. The reality of being human is that our brain tends to gravitate towards the negative–it is a form of self preservation for our brain, which ultimately prioritizes our survival above our emotional or relational well being. In Paul’s letter to the Philippians, he tells them: “whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things” (4:8). Paul understood this aspect of our humanity, which naturally gravitates towards the negative and he encouraged them to practice thinking differently. Start with a list of good things that you are grateful for and add to it everyday. Scientific research has confirmed the benefits of Paul’s urging–when we express gratitude, our brain releases a chemical called dopamine, a neurotransmitter which affects our sense of happiness, pleasure and motivation.
4- Practice taking a deep breath. Learning to calm your body down by taking a deep breath is one of the most effective and accessible ways to reduce stress that we have available to us. When we breathe deeply from our diaphragm, we stimulate the vagus nerve, which runs up the middle of our body and up to our brain. Stimulating the vagus nerve sends a signal to your brain that you are safe and your parasympathetic nervous system can activate. The parasympathetic nervous system is our rest and digest system, which we should be operating out of most of the time. In other words, for most of our day, it should feel safe for your body to function normally so it can digest your food and regulate your heart rate and breathing. Deep breathing also helps to improve blood flow to the front of your brain and distribute blood flow throughout your body to reduce tension in our muscles and get strong blood flow to your gut. Many people don’t realize that the indigestion they experience when they are upset is because the body is experiencing a stress response, which reduces blood flow to the gut. I also teach my Christian clients to add simple prayers to their breathwork–for example when you breath in, pray “Lord, I breath in Your peace” then breath out and pray “and release my fear.” You can also pray the ancient Jesus prayer with your breathwork by breathing in and praying “Lord Jesus Christ, son of God” and breathing out “have mercy on me.”
5- Practice self-care. Self-care is a hot button topic these days and in popular culture can lead us towards extreme self-absorption. However, self-care for the purpose of managing your stress can be relatively simple and straightforward: sleep enough, eat well, spend time with your community and move your body. We honor God by taking care of the body He gave us, which is designed to function optimally when we care well for it in these ways. Stay tuned for a series on self-care from a Biblical perspective, but in the meantime, embrace the basics. Your body, brain and soul are all connected. To manage the stressors of life, care faithfully for your body by doing these simple things: sleep enough, eat well, spend time with your community, and move your body.
